the beautifully loud apartment with not a lot of character

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Originally uploaded by adzimney.

this apartment is awesome and loud. and it doesn't have a ton of character. i'm not sure if we should move out or not. right now i'm going to ride it out and see. maybe we'll get used to it, maybe i'll want to tear my ears of the sides of my head.

the fish just died.

so it's a day post coca-cola's death and i'm starting to get over it along with the traffic noises associated with living in a big ass city part of Seattle. it's kind of cool, but at the same time you can't open the windows without hearing a lot of city noises, and that kind of sucks. its almost as if i scored a place in new york city or something. i think i'll porbably get over it, but i am worried about bar noise on friday and saturday nights. and part of me jsut wants everything to be perfect by the time andrea gets here and i know that's not always possible. i just hope she likes it. it hink it's also starting to feel a little more real, and that's scares me. i really need to start stepping it up at work, but it's hard when i dont feel completely comfortable at home. i kind of need to get all that shit squared away first. we'll see. right now i need to get to some work-type stuff and change the battery on my computer. let's cross our fingers that it doesn't shut down the machine... cross,cross.

2004_12/15

First posting, and I've been moved to start a blog after my trip to China. I'll be backdating to tell the story of my visit to Zhanjiang to see my brother for the first time in four months. I've never kept a journal before. My main source of documenting my life has been my digital camera which I'm intending to also use on this site. I'm not sure how often I'll be posting. Maybe it'll tuen into an every night sort of thing just like little Doogie Howser. I guess we'll have to see. I just feel that I have some stories to tell, no matter how small they might be, and if I'm the only one who ends up reading them years from now, I will be satisfied with that.

So I suppose we should talk about today so far. I am still working at Wow+Flutter in Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA— but this will all be coming to an end after New Year's. After that, I'll be working for Kerker (a small advertising agency out in Edina, MN). I'm not too thrilled about the driving distance since I haven't had a car for a number of years now, but the experience should be pretty great regardless.

I have a cold today. Thought it might be a sinus/ear infection (last year I had both at the same time. Not fun. Lots of green stuff pouring out of my little body.). I cancelled my doctor's appointment though because I'm feeling a bit better. Still depressed about not being in China, but my health is better.

I'm also reading the Alchemist right now which is a great book. Very interesting. And it's kind of freaking me out with all its talk about listening to your inner spirit and watching for omens and such. I felt like I saw omens all over the place about a year or two ago, but have been feeling a little lost in the last year. I think it's because I've been doing the same nothing at my job. But that's almost over, and maybe things will change. Hopefully things will change.

Actually, lots of things have been changing in my life recently. And I don't deal all that well with change. Don't think that I'm some freak who never likes to experience new things, I just need them to feel right, and often times I sit and think about them too much and don't just follow my gut, and then I start to confuse myself.

So the changes are thus: My job, my lease (up in Febreuary) which means I'll probably need to decide if I am willing to move in with my girlfriend yet which means that she wants to get engaged which means I need to buy a ring which means I need to make way more money than I'll be pulling in at my new job. Did I mention that it's actually an internship? Yeah. Only $10/hr with no benefits. So I'm not going to be rolling in any money. And I've got the old school bills to pay. Being in your twenties does have a few downsides. It's not all partying with friends and sitting around watching Conan O'Brien. It's also a lot eating grilled cheese sandwiches and trying to score free meals from parents and friends and watching your credit card bill rise month after month.

Those are my stresses. Those, and my deep down desire to move out of Minneapolis. Not that I don't like it here. And definately not that I don't have any friends here. In fact, nearly all my friends are here. They definately aren't in these othere cities I want to live in. I just want to see something new and possibly get out of the cold for a few years. It's too damn cold in Minnesota to deal with it for my entire life. I need out. I need to not work in Edina. But I also need to work in Edina first, or else I'll never be able to move. In the advertising world, they like you to have a bit of experience before hiring you on, so working an internship with shit pay is a necessary evil.

Okay, I'm going to stop. But I'll be back. I'm starting to like this blogging thing. Even if I'm the only one who will ever read it.